she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
it was like having sex with a tree stump
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize