I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
