why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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