oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Randomize
