Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
