He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
