Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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