Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
