Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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