just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize