I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
