I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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