is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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