And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
two words...techno handjob
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
