i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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