I heard we made out
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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