I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i will never coherently bang her
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
