Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
