I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
