did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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