maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
