Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Randomize
