Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
