I accidentally burped into my bong.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
