last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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