Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I need to calm my uterus...
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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