I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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