do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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