I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
