By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
