I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize
