problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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