how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
