he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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