? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
