The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Sext me about skeletons
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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