i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
