she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
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