At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
We had to coat check the pizza.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
