what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
