Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
