i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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