and next time when you feel me up, do it right
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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