i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
