remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize