There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
