i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
All I want is dick and wine.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
