i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize