Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize