Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
