What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
