At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
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