who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize