You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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